Change of Heart
by HannahWasNotHere
Summary: "Clare," I muttered, loving the way her name felt on my lips. I grabbed her hips and she gasped "I hate you" I growled in her ear " why?" her angelic voice hurt and shaky. " because of the way you make me feel. I can't trust myself around you. I love you"
1. Chapter 1

**CLARE'S POV**

I sat staring at my English assignment with hatred. I just couldn't get it right. I couldn't focus_. My parents must really be getting to me! I love to write, what is wrong with me? _I wonder, irritated. Suddenly Ms. Dawes enters the room and asks the class for their attention. It takes a few minutes for everyone to quiet down. I didn't even bother to look up; I just kept staring at the blank piece of paper in front of me with pure hatred. Finally an idea clicks into my head, but I forget in when Ms. Dawes says "Excuse me, but you'll all quiet down unless you want detention with me. I have an announcement to make" _Damn you, Ms. Dawes .I had _it. I grit my teeth and she makes a small cough, finally gaining everyone's attention. "A new student will be joining us this semester." The class erupts into curious whispers. "Young man, you can come in the room now." You can tell by Ms. Dawes voice that she is smiling.

A can feel a shift in the energy when the new boy walks in. I still don't look up. My idea was starting to form back in my head and I started writing furiously. "Sit anywhere you like." Ms. Dawes is still smiling. I roll my eyes. _It's just a new kid, what's the deal_? The class's whispering had kicked into high-gear the second the boy had walked into the room

"He looks creepy," A redheaded girl mutters to her friend, a blond cheerleader with the brain the size of a squirrel's.

"I thinks he's kind of _hawt_! But deff creep-ay!" the blond exclaims in a whisper. I never did bother to find out there names. Why would I socialize with people like that? All I need is to get through High school, and then maybe focus on friends. I do NOT need the drama of relationships in my life right now, and I DEFINATLEY don't need a romantic relationship right now. Especially with how my parents are. I swallow past the lump in my throat, recalling the fights that are beginning to become physical in her house, and continue to write my essay. KC had taught me that, and it was a lesson I wouldn't soon forget.

_KC. The liar who had cheated on me with one of my best friends. The reason why I rarely trusted anyone. _I couldn't help my self but think. The new boy plops down in the seat right in front of me. _That's strange. _I note, _why would he sit there? There are other available seats, and one is sitting next to Mary Hopkins and it's clear that she likes him. _ I shrug it off and continued writing. Guys are weird. Maybe He just liked to sit near the front?

"Excuse me, young man. Would you like to introduce yourself to the class?" Ms. Dawes questions him.

"Sure." He says, and by the way his voice sounds, its easy for me to guess that's he is rolling his eyes. He stands up and faces the class. "My name is Eli Goldsworthy." My eyes shoot up. I couldn't help myself. There was something about his voice, so mysterious but gentle, that made me look up. He had very dark hair, and was wearing all black clothing. To be specific, black skinny jeans and a black button up shirt with a black blazer. My heart began to flutter. I recognized him. He drives a hearse. He killed my glasses earlier in the day. I gulp down a shaky breathe.

He sits back down in his chair and takes a deep breathe. _He is, indeed, _very_ attractive._ I suddenly find myself hating the blonde girl who is batting her eyes at him flirtatiously. He completely ignores her, which makes me giggle.

"What's so funny, Blue-eyes?" He turned around. _Blue-eyes? I've only talked to him once before, and he already gave me a nickname? _I have to admit that when he said it, my stomach turned into knots. And NOT In a bad way. But in a foreign way, that left me a little queasy after it.

"Oh, come on! Like you haven't noticed!" I laugh in a whisper.

"I'm afraid I don't. Care to elaborate?" He smirks. His mouth is perfectly lopsided, making me stomach go crazy. His lips look soft and pink and I have to bite down and my lower lip to restrain my sudden urge to lean forward and touch my lips to his._ Bad thoughts, Clare. That would go against everything you stand for_. I tell my self confidently. But thinking is much easier than actually listening to your thoughts_._ I giggle and point towards the blond and her redhead friend who were giggling like mad and batting there eyes at him, the cheeks flushed.

"Umm, look to your left" I giggle. He raises his eyebrow suggestively, but follows my finger and looks at the girls, who are giggling even louder and they begin to wave at him. His eyes go wide-which, if I hadn't mentioned, are the most beautiful shade of green I think I've ever seen in my life- and he turns his head back to me, looking officially 'creeped out'.

"Freakin' creepy preps." He mutters under his breathe. I giggle, my cheeks, turn a rosy color, though I'm not sure why. He looks at me and gave me another heart-stopping smirk.

"Ms. Edwards, could you stop talking to Mr. Goldsworthy for just a minute and answer my question?" Ms. Dawes said irritably. My eyes shoot up. I wasn't even aware she had said anything.

"Uh, Yes, Ms. Dawes. Would you mind repeating the question?" I say nervously. This was _not_ like Clare Edwards. Clare Edwards pays attention. She listens during class. She was _good_. _What's happening to me?_ Eli smirked again_. I'm still good-but for how much longer? _I challenged my self. This was the first time I have even met the boy, and I'm already starting to stop paying attention in class. _What is happening to innocent little St. Clare Edwards?_


	2. Chapter 2

**ELI'S POV**

I watch as Clare squirms in front of me, answering Ms. Dawes barrage of random questions. I'm impressed that she can really answer most of them. I look at my nails, a smirk on my face as I absentmindedly color on my nails with a black sharpie. I've never had this affect on someone before, and I really like it.

_And no one has ever had this affect on you. _Sometimes I really wish I could protest to my thoughts with out feeling crazy.

Okay, I'll admit it. I, Elijah Goldsworthy, find Care Edwards _very _interesting. Now bring on the gavel and sentence me to a semester of torture. Because no matter how much I like Clare, I can _never _be with her. It's too dangerous, for her and for me. She can get hurt. And I swear, if I _ever_ see those beautiful blue eyes hold an ounce of pain, I fear I might try to kill whoever did that to her, and if that person was me…

I shake my head. _You're thinking crazy, Eli. Forget about Clare. Even if you could be with her, what makes you think the feeling is mutual?_ I know its true, but, damn, is it depressing. Cursed with a life of no love, where I have to walk alone. It protects them, if I don't show any emotion. And I want them safe, because it would hurt to much if I let them in and they knew what a monster I am. I can imagine Clare's horrified and disgusted face when I tell her about my past, show her the scars… I become angry.

I can never be normal! I can never allow myself to _feel. _I can never let the hormones raging in veins to take over, and be a normal kid with a crush. Nope. Can't happen. But her smile is so tempting, and when her small pink lips part to answer Ms Dawes questions I begin to go insane. Her sapphire eyes look nervous as she answers our teacher's questions, searching through her mind for the correct answer. _Jesus, Eli_, I think hopelessly, _you've known her for less than twenty-four hours and she's already turning you into a love-sick sap?_ But I can't help my self. She's so…different. She was nothing like the other girls, who spent hours on their appearance and walked, talked, and acted, a certain way because it was socially acceptable. No, Clare was _herself_. She was smart and her cheeks turned the most adorable pink when she was nervous. And I make her nervous. I smirk. Finally letting my thoughts get to the best of me. But just as soon as I give in, the bell rings.

_Thank God. Saved by the bell. _I sulk out of the class room, purposely bumping into her as I walk out. _Bad move, Eli. Think sanely. _I had to admit, she was sexy when she was irritated, especially when it's because of me. I see her walk over to a tan Indian girl with long, dark hair. I can hear her complaining about me. I smirk, especially when the tan girl shouts

"I get it Clare! You're in love with Eli!"

"I am not!" Clare replies hotly, her cheeks turning an amazing red. I chuckle to myself. Then I try to imagine myself, standing there, with a goofy grin, chuckling at no one. I immediately straighten up and head towards my next class. And never, not even once, did Clare Edwards leave my thoughts. Oh-no. This will be a lot harder then I thought it would be.

**CLARE'S POV**

I rub my temples, unable to think clearly. I sat through Algebra with the most confused look on my face. This _can't _be happening to me. I have to push him out of my thoughts, trying my hardest to do my work. It's not easy, but I get all the way to lunch in one piece.

I walk into the cafeteria and take my usual spot next to Alli and Connor, with Wesley and Dave sitting across from us. I sighed, rolling around my apple before I decide I've tortured it enough and put it out of it's misery by taking a huge bite out of it's side. I scan the cafeteria, assuring my self that I was just people watching, not searching for one set of gorgeous green eyes and lop-sided smirk.

"Looking for me?" A voice sounds behind me, sending chills through my body. I turn around and, sure enough, it's Eli.

"Hey, nice to see you too," I smile, proud of myself for being able to avoid the truth without lying.

"Mind if I sit here?" He gestures to the empty space next to me. Alli lets out a small squeal. What have I gotten myself into?

"Sure," I mutter looking down at my abused apple, and taking another, smaller, bite. Eli sits down next to me. Alli coughs, indicating that she wants an introduction.

"Oh- uh, guys this is Eli. He's in my, uh, English class" I say awkwardly, blushing slightly. Eli waves shyly.

I point at everybody in the order I say there names "Eli, these are my friends, Connor, Dave, Wesley, and Alli." I look down and Eli grabs my hand. _Whoa._ How am I not dead yet? My heart is literally beating a mile a minute.

"Hey." He mutters, not once taking his gaze off of mine. But of course, Alli, being –well, being Alli- has to go and ruin the moment.

She puts her hand out, so he can shake it.

"I'm Alli Bhandari." He takes his hand out of mine, so he can awkwardly shake Alli's. She smiles and winks at me, giving me the thumbs up signal when Eli is looking the other way. I hide my head in my hands, blushing a thousand different shades of pink.

While Eli makes small talk with Dave, he snakes his fingers between mine, intertwining them and squeezing them lightly, before looking me in the eyes and smiling. A full smile. That's a first. I blush even harder and look down at my apple, taking another bite and absentmindedly thinking about how great – or painful- this year will be.


	3. Chapter 3

**ALLI'S POV**

I stare at Clare and Eli as he slowly places his hand into hers and her cheeks flush. I fight my sudden urge to hop up and down and squeal. How cute! My little Clare is growing up. I beam at her and wink, again. She just rolls her eyes, even though I can tell on the inside she feel's just like me, or better. I didn't find Eli as attractive as some people did, but I did have to admit, he was C-U-T-E. But he was Clare's and I was so happy for her! Oh, yes, this year is gonna be fun. Clare has Eli, and I have my sights set on a new football player, drew. Oh, and if Clare is thinking for a second that she is getting away from me without telling me every single detail of her classes with Eli, she is SADLY mistaken. I smile mischievously. Eli leans down to Clare and mutters something in her ear that makes her blush even harder –if that was possible- and she playfully punches his arm.

**ELI'S POV**

My heart is racing and I begin to fear my palms will get sweaty. _Real smooth. Get her hand soaked because you can't control yourself. _I chastise myself.

I look over to see Clare's friend, Alli staring at us with an expression that read 'Awwwww!' and I awkwardly glanced at the hand I have intertwined with Clare's and for some odd reason, it calms me down and I don't feel as awkward. I start chatting with Dave, who has a shaven, shiny head, a cocky voice, and a red shirt with blues jeans. He was kind of typical, clearly love-struck for Alli, which I didn't quite understand, because honestly, she scares me a little. I can tell, she's devious. And I think that she will be able to pry things out of me that I don't mean to reveal. I had to keep an eye on her.

She notices that I'm looking at her and smiles sweetly, while waving. Dave stiffens. _Chill dude, she's definitely NOT my type_. I nearly muttered the words out loud. The almost-statement causes me to think, what exactly_ was _my type? _Clare is. _I unconsciously answer. I should leave now. Save both me and Clare a lot of pain.

But I can't.

I can't leave her.

I don't know if I would be able to get through the year.

Hell, I don't know if I could get through another day. And I honestly couldn't tell if Clare was driving me insane, or keeping me sane.

I look at her and she smiles up at me, shyly. She was cute shy.

"Hey" I mutter. It's the only thing I could think of. But 'hey'? That wasn't very sarcastic or flirty. What's wrong with me today? Maybe I should flirt. Maybe I should scare Clare away, show her a glimpse of who –or what- I really am. But when she answers me back with a simple "Hey" back, I know I can't. Damn those captivating blue eyes and sweet voice. Not only is she beautiful, but her personality shines just as bright. I can see, behind her happy charade, there was depression flickering ever so slightly in her eyes. What's troubling Blue-eyes? _Probably just a test she's worried about._ I laugh, and she gives me a 'What are you laughing about' look.

"What are you laughing about" she says, almost immediately after I think it. I smile. _Think of a save Eli, Think of a save._

"Nothing, it's just, you have pudding on your face" I lie. Then I immediately come up with a plan.

He hands automatically soot up to her face "Where?" she questions.

"Right, there." I say, as I playfully pick up a spoon with pudding on it and wipe it off on her face, laughing

"Elijah Goldsworthy. You did _not _just cover my face with pudding! She says, fuming.

I smirk "So what if I did" _There's the little flirt I know and love._

Soon she takes the same spoon and tosses pudding on my face. I gasp and smirk widely

"You've just started a war that you'll never win" I growl

"Try me." She smiles, throwing even more pudding in my face.

**CLARE'S POV**

Our mini food fight turned into war and we winded up taking a few extra minutes to clean ourselves up. We wind up being a little late to our science class, which is one of only four classes we have, including lunch.

"I hope you two have a good excuse for being fifteen minutes late." Our angry teacher rants. I look at the floor with shame while Eli just begins to crack up.

He's laughing

_Laughing?_

I look up at him in shock. It's official, this boy is insane.


	4. Chapter 4

**CLARE'S POV**

Well, Eli's little scene caused us to get a detention on Friday. Great. My mom's gonna kill me. When the bell rang I stormed out of the class and ignored him when he followed me all the way to me locker.

"What's the matter, Blue-eyes? Afraid of a little trouble?" Eli laughs, raising his brow quizzically.

He better stop laughing, if he knows what's good for him. I look him in the eye trying my hardest to stay firm when I say "Because of you, I'm dead. My mother is going to _kill _me. And you're paying for the funeral. I want an extra expensive casket and flowers everywhere."

"Oh, come on! One little detention never hurt anyone! And besides, the first time you ride in my hearse will not be to your own funeral. I'll make sure of that." He says as I collect the last of the books I need from my locker. I slam it shut and spin around quickly, walking away as fast as possible, avoiding eye contact.

"Oh, yeah? How do you purpose to make sure of it?" I challenge him. He smirks. _Stupid perfect mouth_. I curse him.

"I'll drive you home." It's not a question, it's a statement.

"And if I refuse?" I raise my eyebrow, proud that I was able to challenge him without blushing or stuttering. 

"Then I'll take you against your will" He smile deviously.

I smile back at him, feeling a blush warm my cheeks. _Uh- oh._ I look down at the floor automatically chewing on my lip, hoping he won't notice. If I blush one more time today, I think I'll have beat a record.

"Fine." I mutter, still looking down. "I'll meet you by your car?" I look into his eyes and there is amusement. He smirks.

"His name's Morty." He smiles. "And yeah, I'll see you then, Clare." He walks away, still with a smirk.

**ELI'S POV**

It takes all I have not to cheer while I walk down the halls on my way to my next class. Not really my style. I still can't picture Clare Edwards sitting in a hearse. I chuckle at just the thought. Two more classes to go, then I'm free. And I get to drive the most beautiful girl at Degrassi home.

_Oh no. I forgot Jess._ I groan and pull out my phone. Its old, and a piece of shit, but, eh, it works okay. I scroll through my contacts until I find her number.

I begin to type a message to her.

"_Hey, Jess"_ I send.

"_Hello, Mr. Goldsworthy. You know, texting in school is not allowed. I don't think you'll leave a very good impression on your first day at Degrassi"_ She replies, almost immediately. Ever since she got that damned phone, she's become a pro at texting

"_Har-har. Your humor slays me, Jess, it really does. But I bring bad news. You kind of have to walk home today. You okay with that?"_ I hit the send button, worried that she'll be angry with me.

"_Yeah, sure. Who wouldn't love to hike a whole mile in 98 degree weather while wearing all black?" _I can practically hear the sarcasm in the message.

"_Sorry, I'm sort of busy after school_." I check the time after I send it. One minute till class starts. I need to hurry.

"_Detention on your first day, Eli_?" I start to briskly walk up the stairs, trying shakily to type back.

"_Not this time. I'll see you after school, Kay? I'm in a hurry._" I hit send, practically beginning to run towards class. _ Thirty seconds. Move, Eli, move!_ I run into the class, just as the bell rings. The teacher smiles at me and I take a random seat in the back.

**CLARE'S POV  
**

The rest of the day seems to drone on forever. When I finally am dismissed from my last class, I walk out to the parking lot to see Eli smirking and leaning against 'Morty'. I stride forward to him. He smirks.

"Miss Edwards." He says, trying to sound formal as he opened the hearses passenger door. I couldn't help but giggle at the way he drew out his words when he attempted to sound proper. Eli walks around Morty and hops into his seat revving up his car. The radio is on full blast and a loud screamo song is blasting from the speakers, making the car vibrate. I scream in alarm and quickly bring my hands to my ears, shutting my eyes tightly. I can hear Eli laugh and turn it down.

"Hey, it's _The Devil Wears Prada_! What do you have against them?" He says, still cracking up. I glare at him.

"The fact that they just almost made me deaf!" I growl, still shaking.

"Aww, was little St. Clare scared?" He asks teasingly.

"No," I reply angrily. _He's just trying to get under your skin._ I remind myself coolly. "You call this music? What's the name of the song?" The person- or dying animal- continued to scream in the radio.

"Yes, I call this music. This band is epic and must be appreciated as such." He smirks. "And the name of the song is _Reptar, king of the Ozone_." He starts to bob his head to the beat. I can't help but think about how weird a name that is. My ears begin to adjust to the loud music and when the singer begins to actually sings, the music isn't all that bad.

"So, where to?" Eli questions me. I give him directions to my house as we drive, making small talk at stop signs and mildly flirting for the rest of the drive. I began to ask him questions. I found out his favorite color is black – not really surprised there- and that he has one little sister and a dog. Somehow he was able to find out about Darcy – just that she existed and was is Kenya, but I didn't tell him anything about her rape. I found out that we both like the same books and movies. His favorite comic book is _The Goon,_ and his favorite his favorite drink is Monster.

"I've never had a Monster before." I blurt right after he says that.

He shakes his head, his smirk appearing once again. "Poor, poor, innocent Clare, never having her taste buds in bliss from the wonderful sugary taste of a Monster." He chuckles.

"Maybe one day I'll try one." I tilt my head to the side, wondering exactly what Monster tasted like. I had seen Alli with one once, but I never considered trying it. When the loud screaming ended a new song that I recognized began to play.

"_You may feel alone when you're falling asleep  
And every time tears roll down your cheeks  
But I know your heart belongs to someone you've yet to meet  
Someday you will be loved  
You'll be loved, you'll be loved  
Like you never have known  
The memories of me  
Will seem more like bad dreams  
Just a series of blurs  
Like I never occurred"  
Someday you will be loved" _I sang along to the tune quietly.

"You know this song, Edwards?" Eli says, eyeing me.

"Yeah, it was kind of like, a, uh, break up song for me." I mutter, thinking about how I tried to imagine that the lyrics were true, and I was going to one day meet the one who love me. _Could that be Eli? _I wonder, but push the thought away by shaking my head a little.

Eli just makes a little "Humph." Noise, like he's surprised I know any music that he does too.

I start to see my house in the distance and sigh. I don't want this little car ride to end. "There it is, home sweet home." I point to my house and Eli pulls over.

"You seem disappointed, Blue-eyes. What, you don't want to have to leave my side?" He smirks. I can't help but blush and bite my lip. How does he do this to me? And yeah, maybe he was right, but there is NO way I'm giving him the satisfaction of knowing that.

"Yeah, sure lets go with that." I say sarcastically, rolling my eyes. Beginning to open the door to get out of the car. I feel a slight pressure on my shoulder and turn to see Eli looking at me, with his hand on my shoulder, and even though there is cloth in-between his skin and mine, I still shudder, bolts of electricity taking over.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" He asks, looking at me hopefully.

"Yes, yes you will." I smile, just as I get out of Morty and walk to my house, but not before I turn and see him with a wide grin chuckling to himself.

**A/N: Hello, readers! :D I just wanted to let you know I don't own any of the bands or songs that I referenced to in this, or Degrassi, or monster. But oh, how much better the world would be if I did * mind wonders of to a beautiful place filled with Eli, monster, and screamo music***

**Well anyways, I wanna thank the people that added this story to their favorites/ Story alerts. I smiled when I saw all of them, and I promised you all got mentally hugged and given cookies. Please review, because lately I have been lazy with my writing and reviews always inspire me:D**

**And I know, this chapter was boring. Don't be trollin' xD. It was just a filler. I PROMISE the next one will hold all of the excitement. And just to let you know, don't worry about Jess. She's not Eli's girlfriend or anything like that; I couldn't give him a girlfriend when Clare is in the story! They're just too adorable together. In the next chapter you'll meet Jess and learn a little bit about Eli's home life. And things get shaky at Clare's house. Ooh drama 3 Well its 2:23 in the morning where I am so im gonna go take a nap and hopefully update tomorrow. Goodnight!**


	5. Chapter 5

**ELI'S POV**

I begin to drive home, a smirk on my face. Then when I reach a stop light I stop and think. _What are you doing? _I honestly don't know. I promised myself to stay away from Clare, not talk to her, and only admire her from afar. Driving her home is not exactly _afar_. I shake my head. I might as well live a little. And besides, driving her was just a friendly gesture, nothing more, _right? _I begin to take the back roads on my way to my secluded house. I begin to drive deeper in the forest, as the dark asphalt roads began to turn into dirt roads. _The Flood_ by _Escape the Fate_ begins to play and I sing along a little, bobbing my head to the beat. I see a small house, far behind trees, with a long dirt driveway. I pull my hearse into the lot and hop out. Just as I turn Morty off I turn to see Jess walking up the driveway, wheezing. Her expression plainly reads 'I'm going to kill you.' She runs towards me and grabs me by the neck, playfully choking me.

"I had to walk. A mile. In ALL Black. With. Almost no shade. In almost 100 degree weather. You owe me. Big." She growls, and even though she's trying to sound threatening her voice is still high pitched and wheezing. Her arm aground my neck tightens and I begin to actually choke.

"Can't. Breathe. Jess!" I manage to choke out.

"Good. I haven't been able to breathe for the past forty minutes." She says her voice still angry. Even though Jess is very short and skinny and pretty much the definition of _small _she is extremely strong. I manage to shake her off and run into the house.

"You're not getting off that easy, Goldsworthy!" She yells after me, using her small, pale hand to push her dark side bangs out of her green eyes that are the same shade as mine. She runs into the house and jumps onto my back, pulling at my hair playfully. "I'm never walking home, again. Promise me that!" She hisses into my ear.

"Ouch! Jess let go of my hair. OUCH!" she was really starting to pull on my hair roughly now.

"I will when you surrender and promise to be my escort to and from school, and anywhere else I please, for the rest of my life." She says. Damn her. She knows how to win an argument.

"How about until you get your license?" I plead.

She pretends to consider and then grabs my hair tighter. "Nope."

"Ugh. Fine, I'll drive you around! Now get the fuck off!" I yell, and she jumps of my back, a devious yet pleased smile on her face.

"So, how was your first day of Degrassi?" She says innocently. She begins to brush through her hair, which is almost the exact shade as mine, with her pale fingers.

"Eh, boring to say the least. I met someone, though, who seems interesting." I raise an eyebrow at her, but she is to busy walking over to the small leather love seat in the living room.

"Who? Is it a girl? Does the infamous Eli Goldsworthy have a _crush?_" She says, smirking, her pink lips able to achieve the same lopsided look as mine.

"No, it's not a crush." I say too quickly to be believed. She just shakes her head, smirking and chuckling lightly. "It's kind of why I didn't pick you up. I drove her home."

"Oh yeah, I meant to ask you that. And just to let you know, I hate you." She mutters.

"No you don't, you love me more than anything in the whole world." I say rising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, okay." She rolls her eyes

"How was your first day at Lakehurst?" Jess goes to a different high school, because we both agreed that if we didn't let anyone know we knew each other we would be safer from _him_. I shook my head, doing anything to forget about him. We had to lay low, not call too much attention to ourselves and we could only hope that he wouldn't find us again. The last time he found us, he killed- I shake my head refusing to remember who was killed and who killed them.

"Boring as hell. I got a lot of stares when I jumped out of a hearse with screamo music blasting out of it." I took her pause as a chance to bow and smirk. "Some little group of preps tried to trip me in the hallway, but don't worry, I made sure that they were the one who hit the floor." She smirks.

"Jess." I cut in, hating that I have to go all legal guardian on her, but if I don't thing will only get worse. "Not another fight on your first day of school!" I groaned. Jess likes to fight. It got her angers out. I helped her forget about _him_, and the horrible thing he did to us.

"I didn't hurt them _that _bad" She mutters, quickly inspecting her nails. "Just enough to let them know that you don't mess with Jess Goldsworthy without a few bruises." She smirks.

"When will you learn?" I sigh.

"Never." She smiles. "You know how stubborn I am. I never learn my lesson until it's too late. It's not easy, going through high school when you look like you still belong in eighth grade!" I guess that's true. Jess was a sophomore, but she technically was supposed to be a freshman. She just skipped ahead a grade but she had perfect marks. She gets up, and turns on the radio, suddenly dancing to _My Chemical Romance_. I smirk. She runs over to me pulling me into the living room and prompts me to mosh with her. I laugh and join, listening as the radio screeched out the lyrics to _It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Fucking Death Wish. _I shake my head, watching as Jess Jumps off of the couch pretending to play air guitar. I laugh as she sings along, her high feminine voice so different from the song, yet it still sounds good with it. My sister is truly the strangest person I know, but I love her for it.

**A/N: Aww, cute, sibling bonding (: Yup, Jess is his sister if you hadn't already guessed it x) so just a few questions, then I'll write Clare's part. What do you think of Jess? Her story gets deeper later on, just to let you know. Who do you think the mysterious **_**him**_** is that Eli is so terrified of? Who do you think was killed? If you leave a review, I'll answer those questions and more, faster! I pinky promise (: Ok, my rambling is over, the story must go on!**

**CLARE'S POV**

Not even ten minutes after I walked inside Alli calls me. I sigh and answer as I walk upstairs, into my room.

"Spill." She says immediately

"Hi, nice to hear your voice again, too." I say, smiling sarcastically.

"Hi." She says, irritated. "Now, spill!"

I sigh once again, and tell her all of the day's events, blushing when I recall lunch. She doesn't interrupt, except with the necessary 'Uh-huh' and 'Awww!' and the occasional 'He's _so _into you!' I talk to her after that for an hour or so until I hear my parents walk in.

"Hey, I have to go." I interrupt her story about the new boy Drew who she had her eyes on.

"Kay, I'll see you tomorrow!" I hear her say, just before I close my phone. I could already hear them screaming. A plate crashed onto the floor, and I put my hands to my ears, wincing. I wish they would stop. I wish we could be normal again, and that the never fought, and that Darcy was still here. I miss her a lot. I can hear my father screaming, horrible, cruel words at my mother; the person that he loved and vowed to never hurt her. _Things change._ I hear something tell me, softly. I walk over to my bed, picked up my iPod touch and put on _P.O.D- Tell me why_. I sat back on my bed, closing my eyes, hoping to just sleep through the fighting.

_I drift off to sleep. In my dreams, I see Eli. He is holding me, comforting me. Fighting off my demons for me, using every ounce of strength he has to protect me. He convinces my parents to stop fighting. He mends my broken heart and teaches me how to trust again. He rekindles my faith that I was slowly losing my grip on before. He is able to convince me that life was good, and in the dream, we fall in love, and he protects me, through everything until we grow old and die peacefully together._

I sleep peacefully for an hour, before I'm awoken to the sound of another glass shattering, and the angry shouts afterwards. I hear the sound of a fist meeting a bone, and the pained scream afterward. I feel the need to hide, but I can't. I can't let this go on. So, slowly, I creep out of my room, just in time to catch my mother being thrown against the wall, as my father screams "You Whore!"

"Stop." I plead, in a low whisper, so low that I wonder if he even heard me.

"_What _did you just say to me?" My father lets go of my mother, and she falls to the floor in pain.

"I said 'Stop.'" I say, my voice growing stronger. My father's eyes meet mine, and I gasp in shock. I recall seeing them as a little girl, when they were filled with laughter, love and warmth. Now all I could see is ager and bloodlust. I cringe, backing up slowly. He wouldn't hit me, would he? Right now I'm not so sure. He runs up to me, slapping me hard against my face, causing me to fall the floor, gasping in pain as I land right on broken pieces of glass.

"Get in your room, now!" he screams hatefully at me. I scramble off the floor, tears in my eyes as I reluctantly leave my mother behind and run into my room. I burst through my door, and lock it behind me. I immediately run over to the bathroom that is connected to my room. I look in the mirror, gasping in shock when I see the huge red handprint on my pale cheek. I tentatively poke at it and wince when it burns.

I hear the sound of my laptop, indication that I have an IM.

I walk over to it and see that it's from Eli. I remember giving him my username while we were driving to my house.

**Eli-gold49: **hey, Edwards, how's it goin?

I wonder if I should tell him about my parent. I mean, I've only known him for a little while. But I trust him, a lot more then I trust other people. Which was _very_ strange.

**Clare-e23: **it's been better.

I sigh as I feel my wound, and I notice that tears are slowly running down my cheeks.

**Eli-gold49: **what, can't understand a question for your homework?

**Clare-e23: **It's not funny, Eli. My parents are fighting. They got…physical.

**Eli-gold49: **Shit. Now I feel like an ass. I'll be at your house in ten minutes.

Just as I begin to type back to him, telling him that even though I appreciate the offer, I can't, he logs off.

This _can not _be good. Or…can it?

**A/N: Duhn duhn duhn! A cliffhanger! :O Oh yeah, and like I said be fore, I don't own the bands and songs mentioned, or Degrassi. I might update either later on today, or tomorrow. But probably today, because now I'm itching to just write the next chapter. If you review, I will love you forever. If you want, you can say your opinion on what you think will happen in the next chapter and if I like it, I might work it into the story. Well, I'll see you soon, my lovely readers (:!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: hey guys sorry it took me this long to update. At first I had a little writer's block and when it finally passed my friend called me and asked if I wanted to go to her house, and I ended up staying the night. When I got home and I was ready to finally write, I found out my cat ran away. After 24 hours of freaking out looking for her, I finally found her in a sewer. It was 2 A.M when I found her so I couldn't call anyone to get her out until this morning. She's ok now, she just stinks a little, and I can finally write (:**

**ELI'S POV**

I log off my computer and grab the keys to Morty. Jess looks at me quizzically, but I ignore her.

"Where to?" she asks curiously.

"I'm going to get Clare. She might be coming over. I'm not sure yet."

"Clare? So that's her name? Can't wait to meet her, bro." Her attention immediately turns back to the TV. I run out of the house and settle into Morty and before I know it, I'm already outside of Clare's house. I contemplate on whether I should get out and knock, or call her. I decide on the latter, because I don't want to get her into trouble.

After two rings she answers and her voice sounds week and upset. "Hello?" She says, sniffling a little.

"Hey, Edwards. I'm outside."

"Listen, Eli. I don't know if this is such a good idea. I mean, my mom-"

I cut in before she can convince herself to not come. "I'm already here, so don't make me waste anymore gas and get outside." I say, trying not to sound as if I was snapping at her. I hear her sigh and then the connection ruffles a little bit, but she mutters "Fine. I'll be out in a minute."

I smirk and snap the phone shut. I look at her house and it looks so peaceful, I can't imagine that there could be any sort of dispute going on inside of it. The lawn is trimmed nicely, the brick looks expensive and there are pretty flowers littering the windowsills. Clare suddenly exits out of the front door, her head down, her hand to her cheek. She quickly strides towards me, keeping her head down. It's hard to see her face when she gets into Morty, because it's night time and the widows are tinted so it looks especially dark.

"What's wrong with your cheek?" I ask, concern clearly written across my face.

"Nothing," She answers defensively.

"Okay Edwards that pretty much gave it away. Show me your cheek." I demand. She looks at me, her big blue doe like yes tortured. I realize they are sparkling with tears.

"Listen, Clare, you don't have to show me if you don't want to." I say, putting my hand of her shoulder reassuringly. She continues to stare into my eyes and then lets out a long sigh.

"No, no. I guess you're going to see it sooner or later." She shakily takes her hand off of her cheek and when I look at her my blood begins to boil.

Her soft cheek is swollen and red. Her usually pink lips are red and busted. She closes her eyes and her cheeks begin to sparkle with more tears.

"Who did this to you." I practically growl. _Stay gentle, Eli. Don't want to upset her. She's upset enough. _She looks down at her hand in her lap.

"Who?" I whisper, trying to be gentler but failing miserably. She looks at me and whispers, quiet as the wind,

"My father." It's so quiet, that at first I'm not sure if I heard her correctly. Her _father_? Did _that?_ To _my _Clare? Whoa. She's not anyone's, and she surely not mine. I need to get my thoughts straight.

"I'll kill that bastard!" I yell, slamming my fist on the dashboard. _Sorry, Morty._

"Eli. Please. Don't." She mutters, clearly exhausted. When I look into her eyes, she is still the same Clare. Her eyes are still innocent. She is still kind, and able to love and forgive. I can't help admire her for that. No matter what happens, she will always have her innocence. And I promise I will never let anything take that from her. Not her parents. Not herself. Not even me.

"So," She laughs nervously, "where are we going?"

I smirk and start put Morty in drive "I know just the place." I say, pulling away from her house.

**CLARE'S POV**

I walk into the bathroom one more time, frowning at myself in the mirror. The girl staring back at me had a large bruise swelling up her left cheek and her upper lip was busted. Her blue eyes looked like large oceans of fear and pain. I shake my head. This isn't me. I'm Clare Edwards. I get good grades. My parents don't fight. Or hit me. And I defiantly don't sneak out with boys at- I glance at the clock- Oh God, 1:34 in the morning. But Eli isn't like other boys. And he's just a friend. Right? 

I shake my head. I think _way _too much. I should just let myself be a teen. But it's so hard. I don't want to disappoint my mother… _Snap out of it! You're going out for a late night drive. It's not even a school night. This is what normal teens do._ Please, God, let me normal for one night. Please. I promise I'll pray everyday.

I look at the girl one more time and try to cover up the bruises with make-up. No luck. _I guess I'll just have to go like this_. I sigh and change into skinny jeans and a dark blue t-shirt. Just as I slip on my silver flats, I hear my cell phone vibrate. I check the caller ID. It's Eli. Gulp.

"Hello?" I answer shakily. I hope my parents can't hear me. I begin to slowly make my way downstairs. My mother is passed out on the couch.

"Hey, Edwards. I'm outside." His voice is husky and loud, yelling over the sound of his stereo. I take one look down at my mother. I can't just leave her here…

"Listen, Eli. I don't know if this is such a good idea. I mean, my mom-" I start, the words crashing out of my mouth at full speed. They always did when I was contemplating with myself.

"I'm already here, so don't make me waste anymore gas and get outside." He cuts in. I guess he's right. I sigh and move the phone closer to my ear. "Fine. I'll be out in a minute." I mutter before hanging up. I grab a pen and piece of paper before quickly scrawling,

_Dear Mom and Dad,_

_ You may have noticed that I'm not in my room. I have not been kidnapped, and I'm not running away. I just need time to think. I went out with my friend. No, I wont tell you who. And I wont tell you where were going. I'll have my cell phone with me, but it's turned off. I'll call you when I've cleared my head. I'll be back before dinner._

_Love,_

_Clare_

I drop the paper on the coffee table and lean down to kiss my mothers temple. She reeks of alcohol. She's been doing that a lot since the fighting started. Drinking and passing out on the couch. I walk outside covering my cheek with my hand when I remember the bruising, and brace myself for what Eli will say.

It feels good to cry in front of someone. I haven't cried in front of someone since Darcy left for Kenya. Not even my parents. It was…releasing. Eli pulls away from my house and begins to take roads that I don't recognize.

"Where are we going?" I ask for the seventh time.

"I told you, it's a surprise." He smirks, not even taking his eyes of the road. Thank God. Eli drives like a mad man. When the streets aren't crowded he will go as fast as 80 mph on a 25 mph road. He has the windows rolled down and occasionally will stick his head out of the window, letting the wind hit his face. Music is blasting from the stereo, some unrecognizable rock song.

After nearly an hour of driving we pull up to a little booth. A middle-aged blonde woman with curly hair is inside of it.

"Hi, Eli!" she smiles enthusiastically.

"Hey, Ms. Parker." Eli smiles widely.

"It's been too long. The last time I saw you, you had just gotten Morty, and still had braces!" She says. Eli looks down, mumbling something like "Really? Do you _have _to mention that?" but it's too low for me to really understand. His cheeks are a little pink. I can't help but giggle. Eli, with braces. Ha.

"What can I get you?" Ms. Parker asks with a bright smile. She always seems to be smiling.

"Two for _Motel Hell_." Eli says. Ms. Parker's face goes quizzical.

"Two? Is Jess with you?" She moves her head until she can see me. I wave feebly.

"Oh my! Eli are you on a date?" she practically shouts. Eli's face turns crimson and I can feel my cheeks turning rosy.

"No," Eli says, his jaws clenched. "She's just a friend. Now, can I have the damn tickets?" His face is growing a brighter red by the second, especially when Ms. Parker laughs.

"Now, no need to get snippy young man. I thought your sister was the one with the sharp tongue." She laughs. As she is turning around I hear her mumble "They grow up so fast." When she turns around again she hands Eli two tickets. I can hear her whisper as she leans in "She's very pretty. But don't do anything you wouldn't do if I was watching."

Eli's face turns even brighter, if that was possible. He shoves a twenty in her hand.

"Goodbye, Ms. Parker." He practically shouts before hitting the gas and pulling away from her. I can hear her raspy laugh fading into the background as we drive away.

I giggle at his facial expression. "She was… nice." I say when I finally think of a word to describe her.

"Yeah." He grumbles while driving up to a parking lot with a big screen in the front.

"A drive-in?" I ask when he parks.

"Uh-huh. I used to come hear a lot when I was younger. That's kind of how I know Ms. Parker. Now shhh, the movie is starting." He changes the radio station and a cliché scream fills the speakers. I look up at the screen, and sure enough, a low budget horror film has begun to dance along the sheet. I sit back and watch through an hour and a half of cheap looking blood and tacky screams. At one part where the farmer and the girl are kissing, I sneak a glance at Eli, and see that he's staring at me. My face turns a bright red and I chew on my lower lip, wincing when I accidently bite the skin that was ripped. Eli looks at me with concern.

"You okay?" He asks.

Yeah, I'm fine. I just bit my lip."

"Would _I _have anything to day with that, Miss Edwards?" he smirks, raising his eyebrow in a challenge. I giggle and punch his chest.

"Ouch!" He yells, rubbing the spot I hit. "I thought violence wasn't your style?"

"Where did you hear this?" I ask, not really concerned about the truth. Probably just a rumor. That's weird. I didn't think much about if people have ever talked about me before.

"C'mon. All saints are against violence." He states plainly. I frown

"How many saints do you know that sneak out of their house to go watch movies in a hearse?" I raise a brow. Got him there.

"Hmm, true Saint Clare. You might just be losing you're saintliness." He shrugs. _That's what I'm worried about. _I gulp and take a deep breathe.

**ELI'S POV**

After the movie is over I begin to drive to our next destination. We drive in silence for about a half an hour. After a while, though, I just can't stand the silence.

"What's the matter Edwards? Too busy day dreaming about a certain goth boy to talk?" I ask sarcastically, half hoping its true.

"She looks at me and rolls her eyes. "How'd you guess!" she mocks surprise.

"I can read you're mind. And I must say, some of the thoughts you have about me, while flattering, make me truly question your saintliness." I grin evilly. Her cheeks turn a bright pink. Okay, now I _really_ wish I was privy to her thoughts.

"In your dreams, Goldsworthy!" she scoffed.

"Yeah, I guess so." I smirk and raise a brow, wiggling it suggestively. Her face grows darker.

"No, but seriously, what's on your mind?" I look at her, my playful tone erased.

"My parents." She sighs. "I- I just don't know anymore. I don't know if they're going to get a divorce and if they did, I don't know how I would feel about it. I mean, _they_ were the ones who taught me divorce is wrong. But I don't want them to stay together and be unhappy just because of me. But, if they did get a divorce, where would I go? With my mom or dad? Who would I_ want_ to go with? Would I still be able to go to Degrassi?" the worlds jumbled out of her mouth at top speed.

"Whoa, Clare. Stop. Rewind. Play." When I say this she looks at me, her eyes confused and apprehensive.

"I just don't understand anything anymore" She whispers with tears in her voice. I put my hand on her shoulder, rubbing her back rhythmically, ignoring the slight tingle I get from the feel of her skin._ This is no time to be thinking of her like that._ I sigh mentally. I know it's true. Right now she needs a friend, if anything. I remember, when I was younger, if it weren't for Jess I honestly would have went completely insane…

I see our destination in the distance and I squeeze her shoulder. She looks up at me.

"Were here." I smile.

**CLARE'S POV**

We pull up to an ice cream shop.

"Ice cream?" I voice my surprise. This boy is full of surprises.

"Milkshakes." He corrects with a smile

"Milkshakes?" I ask.

"Must you question everything I do? Just sit back, and relax. You can trust me." He hauls me out of the hearse and to the counter.

"I'll have one large vanilla shake and a…" He looks down at me, pretty much silently asking me what I want. I have noticed that about him. He talks a lot more with his eyes than his voice. I could stare at his eyes all day…_Snap out of it! Eli's a _friend. _And you don't want to loose him as a friend, right? _Right.

"Uh, I'll have, uh, chocolate shake, please." I'm not quite sure why, but I'm always very awkward when I order things. I look at the girl taking our order. She's tall, blonde, curvy and pretty. She nods her head and winks at Eli. She did _not _just do that. I can feel fire burning inside of me, making me suddenly want to hit this girl. I'm not _jealous, _am I? I haven't been jealous since I saw K.C and Jenna and it surely wasn't this bad. When she hands Eli our shakes she shows off her cleavage.

_Whore!_

Wait, I did _not _just think that about someone. I don't even know this girl! But when I see her laugh flirtatiously and throw her hair over her should while she's talking to Eli, I know I don't regret it. Eli just stares at her deadpanned, pulling out his wallet to pay her. When he hands her the money and she starts giggling like and idiot.

"Here." She says. I watch as she hands Eli a piece of paper, and he just stares at her, with a confused expression. Apparently, Eli can't tell when a girl is trying to flirt. Thank God. "Call me sometime." She giggles. He stares at the piece of paper and grabs both of our milkshakes. Just as he is turning away, I turn to the girl, fire burning in my gut. I can feel my face darken and my eyes fill with hatred.

"Back off." I growl. Okay, now I know that there is something controlling me. I did _not, _I repeat; did _not_, threaten someone. Over a boy. Over _Eli. _Her face turns up into a snort and she scoffs. I feel guilty. That was mean. Even if this girl is very, um, how do I put it, slutty? She doesn't deserve to be harassed. _Sorry, God. I will never do something like that again. I don't know what came over me._

I walk over to where Eli is and sit down across from him. I look at the clock, conveniently placed right behind the girl. She is glaring at me. It's 4:00 A.M

"Where'd you find a place open this early?" I ask Eli.

"I get out a lot. Sometimes I get hungry. I saw a sign that led to here and followed it."

I nod. That's simple enough. I hear the door open and Eli stiffens, glaring at who ever it is that walked in. I turn around to look, and I get horror struck.

"Clare Edwards, is that you?" The voice says.

**A/N: ahahahaha CLIFFHANGER: D sorry if it sucked, its early and I have writers block. But I was lagging majorly in updating so I thought I would give you guys something. Please review, because I'm not sure of how to get to my main story line because I need time for Clare and Eli's relationship to grow and I need ideas and such. So review. Even if you hate it I don't care, you can FLAME ME! Constructive criticism is appreciated. It's early and I'm exhausted, so I don't know if I have any grammar mistakes or anything**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: heyy guys. I know it probably sound like I'm making up excuses, but I'm not. I haven't been fast on updating lately because my bird that I've had since before I can even remember died last week. And then school started. Not a fun week. At all. And I didn't want to take my anger and morbidness (not a word, I know) out on this story, but I guess I did a little. Don't worry no one important dies or anything. Just- read and review (: Oh and uh, this chapter is a little gory. Ha, uh sorry. **

**JESS'S POV**

The second Eli walks out of the house; I turn off the T.V and begin to breathe heavily. Usually I'm better at holding in my feelings. Usually.

But being alone is the worst. I see _him _everywhere. Nathan. God, I miss him. He's staring at me accusingly.

"Why didn't you save me? Why do you let him do this to me?" He growls at me, whipping his light brown curly hair out of his face.

"Nathan!" I cry, "I tried! I was so young, Nathan! Eli wouldn't let me help you! Please, Nathan! You have to believe me. Don't go!" I plead, standing up as his edges begin to waver.

"It's too late, Jessica. Goodbye." He says coldly, his green eyes ice. He disappears completely, and I fall to the ground, completely defeated.

"I know." I whisper into the empty room, my eyes stinging. I swallow past a growing lump in my throat. _I _did that to Nathan. I didn't kill him, but I could have stopped _him _from killing Nathan. I refuse to even _think _his name. He's taken so much from me. I refuse to remember him. But sometimes, I can't escape the memories.

_Nathan was working on Morty when I approached him. He looked up and smiled._

"_How's Morty working?" I asked him._

"_Good. I'm a little worried about him though. He broke down right in front of Ms. Parker. Talk about awkward. She kept telling me how I 'couldn't just fix it' and she kept insisting the she drive me to the repair shop. It took me an extra hour just to leave because she didn't think I would make it home safe." I smiled when he said that. Ms. Parker was like the mother that _he _had taken from us. I shook my head trying to forget about him. Nathan had gotten away from him. We were safe. _Were _being the key word._

"_I bet I could fix him." I smiled cockily. He raised his eyebrow and smirked, causing his curly blondish brown hair to fall into his green eyes._

"_Damn, Jessica, you're too confident for your own good." He laughed. _

"_Hmm, I wonder where I got it from." I smirked back at him. He was one of the cockiest people I knew. He scoffed and tousled my hair playfully._

"_I know that you got that damn sarcasm from Elijah. Where is that kid anyway?" _

_I frowned, "Hey, watch the hair, watch the hair!" I moved out of his way. I smiled deviously and pointed towards Eli, who was sitting under a dead willow tree in the front yard. While his head was turned to look at Eli, I jumped on his back and messed up his hair._

"_You're cruisin' for a bruisin', little girl!" he shouted at me as I ran way from him. He jumped on me and we fell to the ground, wrestling and tickling each other. Suddenly the sound of a car door slamming alarmed us. Nathan sat up. "Go get Eli. Run as fast as you can and hide. No matter what happens don't stop hiding. I'll take care of this." I looked at him with worry flooding my face. He- he couldn't be here! We got away, we were safe! Why? Why does this have to happen to us?_

_He smirked at me, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "Listen, after this we'll go see Ms. Parker and you can pick out the movie. I promise. Now, go, get Eli!" He yelled after me as I ran way shakily. Eli was napping under the tree and I had shaken him furiously screaming, "He's here Eli! He found us! Wake up!" His eyes shot open and he took my hand, pulling my into the back yard, just as I heard _him_ yell at Nathan_

"_Where the hell are they?" He was slurring. Drunk. As always._

"_I'll never tell you! They're safe, and you're never going to take that way from them! Not again, not this time!" Nathan yelled back protectively._

"_You're going to tell me, or I'll kill you!" _he _yelled back. I remember tears flooding my eyes at that moment. I knew he wasn't joking. As me and Eli ran into the shed, our hiding place in the backyard, I saw Nathan being shove into the back yard after us. _

"_Where?" His tormenter yelled. I heard Nathan scoff as Eli pulled me to the ground._

"_Get down!" he hissed at me. But I didn't understand. I was only eleven. Eli stood over me awkwardly, holding me down. At the time, he was only thirteen. Nathan was nineteen. So young._

"_I'll never tell!" Nathan growled at him. Another ear splitting noise filled the air. I peeked out the window in the shed. Nathan was on the ground, holding his jaw in pain._

"_Nathan!" I yelled, trying to run to him, but Eli kept a firm grip on me._

"_Nathan told us if _he _ever came back we had to stay down. Nathan can take care of this. He has once before, and he can again." He hissed again. I nodded, tears rolling down my eyes. I wish I didn't listen to him. Then maybe thing would be different._

_I listened to them fighting outside for nearly an hour, screaming and trying to help every time Nathan was hit too hard. Eli would just pull me down, a pained look in his faraway gaze. I watched at _he _pulled out something shiny. _

"_Eli! That's a knife! Eli! Eli, we have to help him! Damnit Eli, let go of me!" I screamed. Eli just held me down, tears slowly filling his eyes. _

"_Nathan! Nathan!" I screeched," Nathan, he has a knife! Look out!" I cried and fell to the floor in defeat, gasping for breath. Eli loosened his grip on me and I shot up, running to the door. I flung it open and watched as _he _approached Nathan, a devious smirk on his face. He rushed forward suddenly, and Nathan let out a horrible scream. I fell to the ground and covered my eyes. I felt Eli rush past me and stayed in the same spot, curling into fetal position. _No, no, no, no, no, no ,no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!_ I repeated in my head. I heard a mischievous laugh and looked up to see the person who stabbed Nathan shuffle out of the yard, as if he didn't just stab one of the best, the only, things in my life. I ran over to Nathan and looked at him. He was clutching his stomach. He looked up at me, his green eyes tortured. _

"_Jessica, Elijah." He coughed out "please, get out of here. Go somewhere safe. I need you to."_

"_I'm not leaving you here!" Eli and I screamed in unison._

_Nathan looked at us, his eyes blank and glazed over. "It's too late for me. Go. Now" He demanded. I hugged Nathan and Eli joined me. "I love you" we both muttered to him before turning and running into the forest, tears running down our cheeks. "I love you too." I heard him cough before closing his eyes, for the last time ever._

I open my eyes and punch the couch. I hate remembering. I can't even cry anymore, I am positive I ran out of tears after that happened. One of the hardest things I had to do in my life was leaving him and jump into Morty. Nathans car. The car he loved so much. The car that we were going to drive in to see a movie. The car that held so many memories. A large black pit-bull walks up to me and licks my cheek.

"Vicious, do you ever miss him?" I ask the dog before pulling him into a tight hug. He whimpers, as if to answer my question. I sigh and walk into the kitchen to feed him. I know the Nathan I saw was only my conscious. He would never talk to me like that. But I would take anything he had to say, just to hear his voice again. Even if what he said was 'I hate you'

Vicious eat the food hurriedly, his blue eyes ravenous. I pet his head and walk towards my room. I hope Eli comes home soon. I don't think I can hold it together for much longer.

**ELI'S POV**

I scoff at the person who said that to Clare. He had short light brown hair. The same shade as Nathan's. I gulp. For some reason, I can't stop thinking about him and I need to make sure Jess isn't like this too. He's staring at Clare like she has two heads.

"D-d-d-d-d," She stutters, her eyes going huge with remorse. The guy let's out a sort-of laugh scoff thing.

"Declan." He helps her, a smile brightening his face. Clare gasps and runs up to him, giving him a huge hug. I mash my teeth together. I don't like watching this. I look down at my hands, anger heating up my face. When I look up there still hugging and he laughs. Then he shakes his head and his eyes go wide, as if he just remembered where he is and, more importantly, what time it is.

"Clare, its kind of four in the morning." He scoffs. Clare's eyes widen and she pulls away from him.

"Oh, uh, its, uh, um, err-," She stutters. I smirk and walk up next to her.

"Why, yes, yes it is." I reply to the guy. Declan. That's his name. Clare gapes at me and when I look at Declan, he's gaping at me, too. Then his lips turn into a knowing smirk. I narrow my eyes. What the hell does he know?

"Clare, do you know this guy?" he practically laughs. _I'll give you something to laugh about._ I do _not_ like how giddy Clare got when she saw him, or how he is looking at her now.

She blushes, "uh, yeah, this is uh-," she stutters again.

"Eli." I cut her off, growling. Declan smiles at me.

"Declan." He pulls his hand out of his blue blazer for me to shake it. I glare at it. He looks at me expectantly for a few seconds. I feel Clare nudge my arm and glares at me. I scoff and shake his hand.

"Pleasure." I mutter.

"So, why exactly are you two here, at _four _in the _morning_?" he put's emphasis on those two freakin' words and it makes me want to hit him. He is smiling widely at Clare and she is blushing furiously.

"We uh, I mean, I uh, Err, Eli uh" Clare starts again. I groan and roll my eyes.

"Please, we could ask you the same thing." I retort. Declan wiggles his eyebrows, which, by the way, look like freakin' caterpillars. Okay, they're not _that_ bad, but whatever.

"That's a good question." He smirks, "I just flew in from New York to visit my sister, and, whilst driving got hungry. So, I came here." He raises his eyebrows defiantly, "And, now that we got _that_ out of the way, you can answer my question." Jesus, this guy is _asking_ for a punch in the face.

"It's none of your business." That was Clare. Whoa, who would have thought she found her voice? Declan and I both raise our eyebrows in surprise. She looks down at her feet, her cheeks flushed.

"Uh- sorry, um, I'll see you at Degrassi, Declan; it was really nice seeing you! Come on Eli, let's go." She mutters quickly, pulling on my arm and dragging me out. I scoff at her.

"You two have fun." Declan chuckles, shaking his head. Clare burns up even more and tugs on me harder, pulling me out of the store completely.

"Whoa, St. Clare, when'd you develop this superhuman strength?" I smirk sarcastically. She pushed me into Morty, not answering. "Usually it's the guy opening doors for the girl." I laugh at her angry expression. Even fuming looked good on her.

"Just drive." She growls, sitting in the seat next to me and awkwardly clicking her seatbelt on. I raise my eyebrows and try to keep from chuckling. I begin to drive and after about an hour the roads turn into familiar dirt paths. Clare's eyes widen then she squints, unable to see past the headlights in the pitch-black darkness. I finally take notice of the song playing on the radio. _I Have to Go Return Some Video Tapes_ by _Breathe Carolina_ begins to play. I smile and bob my head to the beat. This is Jess's favorite song, or at least for the moment. She always changes it every week. I only think she likes about the first half of it, but it is still a good song. I see the house appear and hear a familiar raspy bark sound from the drive-way. As we get out of Morty Clare screams in horror when a familiar black shape pelts after her and pushes her to the ground.

"Eli! Help! It's trying to kill me!" She screams, kicking about shouting as if she was being ripped to shreds. I can't help but double over. "Vicious!" I call between howls of laughter, "Heal!" The shape immediately gets off of Clare and sits obediently in front of me, panting with his tongue lolling out the side of his mouth, his ice blue eyes looking up at me innocently. Clare stands, brushing herself off.

"Eli, this is _so _not funny." She growls seriously, which cause me to howl louder. She bites her lip and then begins to laugh just as loud as me. "That thing is a dog?" she cries between hiccups of laughter, "I thought it was a horse!" she almost falls over.

"His name is Viscous." I say when I catch my breath. "He's my dog,"

"I had guessed that much! Of course _you_ would own a hellhound!" She snorts. I can't help but laugh. Vicious was anything but his name. He was practically just a giant puppy. I pat his head and lead Clare up the familiar steps up to the familiar red door. When I approached I heard the sound of guitar riffs and things being knocked over and loud screaming. My eyes close tightly and Clare grabs my shoulder tightly. "What's going on in there?" she yells, but all I can think is _don't let go. Please, don't let go. _I know what's really going on in there. I sigh and open the door, preparing myself for the disaster Clare would have to witness when we entered.

**A/N: Mwhahaha another cliffy. Oh, how I enjoy these. They make me want to write faster (: anyways, what do you think? Do you like Jess? What do you think of Nathan? Who do you think killed him? What do you think is on the other side of the door? Oh, and yeah, I don't own Degrassi or the music I used in this. And you might notice how random the music is. Yeah, I know its random, but its usually what im listening to while im writing, so I just put it in there xD. Okay, well im gonna go write the next chapter :D**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: hey guys, I know its total BS that I haven't updated lately. I just have been having a very hectic life. A few hard deaths in the family and school has been a bitch. Oh, and writers block has stricken me like the plague. I PROMISE I will update both of my stories with SUPER long chapters when everything clears out. Please don't kill me?**

**With love- Hannah**

**Note: this update will be deleted when I post my other chapter.**


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